I stumbled across this article on ESPN while I wasn’t paying attention to my bro-hating professor today in class. And I couldn’t help but want to leave the room and hop a plane to Connecticut just so I could give a fist bump to and chug a few Natty’s with this bro-king, Kemba Walker.
In the article, written by ESPN columnist Diamond Leung, Walker is quoted as saying that William C. Rhoden’s book Forty Million Dollar Slaves: The Rise, Fall, and Redemption of the Black Athlete was the first and only book he has ever read cover to cover. Walker is a 20 years old and a junior at the University of Connecticut.
What a fucking bro move.
I knew Kemba was a baller. But who knew he was this big of a fucking bro. Bros fucking hate books. The very first book burners in history were definitely some bros who were shithoused off of some Natty. Bros tend to stick to more sophisticated literature, like Playboy, BroBible, or the ingredients on our protein powders. But we occasionally have to read a book or two to get by in class. Kemba has managed to win a fucking NCAA Division I National Championship without reading more than one book cover to cover. Sorostitutes everywhere should be begging to slob on his bro-knob.
Fist bumps, to you Kemba Walker. Bros everywhere should aspire to be more like you.